Today

Today was something else. Aside from my major hungover binge i had yesterday, at least i redeemed that partially today with a morning run and then salad and a small piece of chicken to eat all day. But i might have walked in on something wrong.
He kept texting me during work, asking what i was doing, if i was going there, checking where i was every two seconds. which is very unusual behavior for Him. i knew something was up. So after work i thought i would "surprise" Him with dinner. only to find this girl standing outside His place smoking.
This usually wouldn't freak me out so badly but He has been very strange lately and has been spending a lot of time with her. to the point where He blows me off for her.
He had a huge lunch break today, which, it seems like centuries ago in a time where He still gave a rats fucking ass, He usually would have made some kind of effort to see me, or at least make me feel bad for not going to go and visit him. He did in the end see me, for two seconds, but with girl in arm.
she even had the audacity to walk between us when i walked them to the car as if she had some ownership or something.
My mind is wondering to a very dark place and im not enjoying the ride. I have been here before and i don't want to do this all again. When i got there they both looked so guilty that it scared the shit out of me. she wouldn't even look me in the eye. Now why would she be so afraid to look at me if it was just a harmless visit.
HE drove her all the way home and i sat his place waiting for Him like some kind of sad battered wife. He won't even drive to my place unless i kick and scream. I always have to visit him. after shit long hours of work, and 3 weeks without a break. But I dont complain until I eventually snap.
And He can't understand why I won't move out of the country with Him.
He's already moving on with His life.
And I'm the one left in the horrifying wake of destruction.