Thursday, 11 April 2013

When it Rains, it Pours

Sorry about my silence
Its been...
a bumpy ride I do guess.
The Vegan Thing was a very enlightening experience.
Although it was a little pricey,
not something i can afford right now.

I lost my job. Rather I quit for a better one which never pulled through.
so thats been fun, as from the end of the month
god knows what is going to happen.
I have been looking around desperately.
Looks like I might have to waitress, or something partime to just pay rent.
so i will probably be even more quiet my lovelies

But i am still here.
pounding on.

And my man is leaving me.
In the eye of the shit storm that has hit,
he has been offered a job on the other side of the country.
and i dont do long distance.
It really is a great opportunity,
A lot more money
A bigger city
more experiences.
I have been telling him he needs to get out of here,

I just thought maybe, somewhere in my illusive little fairy tale
I thought maybe we would get out together.
I was going to ask him to move in with me at the end of the year
take the next step
I have never even considered that with any other man
Its not that he is more serious,
Its just that I can actually stand him for more than a week at a time
and i like him
and its relaxed
and i like that
and my skin still tingles when he brushes past me.

My friend says that i am being dramatic
That if i was offered something, I wouldnt even consider him
I dont somehow think that is the case
and coming from her,
who wrote poetry and cried for weeks when her boyfriend of 1 month left for a town 20 minutes away.

My heart feels heavy
i want the best for him.
And if the best is somewhere else,
then i will sit here quietly, with my heart in my throat.
I will keep on smiling
Being happy for him.
because I guess that's what you do for the people you love.


  1. This reminds me of that saying

    'If you love someone let them go, if they return they are yours'

    Sending you a hug x

    1. Thank you dear...

      I know... but that doesn't make it any easier letting go...


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