Another attempt

I'm sorry about the crazy over emotional post yesterday.
I shouldn't type when I feel that rubbish.
I feel a little bit better today, only slightly though.

Things have been really tough at the moment.
I have finally recovered from my stupid sickness, which kept me in bed for about a week.
Lying in bed drives me insane.
I couldn't even drink, and I think that was probably the worst,
Silly habits.
My colleagues at work have started harassing me about my eating, or lack thereof.
There is only so much smiling and stupid jokes you can make before you feel your will and sanity slipping.
And between my mother, my boss, and my man's mother commenting on everything that I do...
I just don't know anymore.
And the snide remarks from my friends.

I had a terrible binge last week. I ate everything in sight.
I don't know if its the cold, or my shit self esteem.
But i just couldn't stop myself.

And then came the purge...
I am a little surprised, a little relived, that I didn't OD on laxatives.
I know. Its so stupid.
And I haven't done it in so long,
but I just needed to rid my body of everything,

And now its fast time.
Nothing, except cigarettes and alcohol, will enter this body until Monday.
And then it will be alright...
I hope...